Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Monologue Jokes about Herman Cain, Justin Bieber, Michele Bachmann and more

On Monday, Michele Bachmann lashed out at Republican rivals, saying some Republicans aspire to be frugal socialists. Then she held up a dictionary as proof she knows the meaning of both words.

Chris Christie is headed to New Hampshire to campaign for Mitt Romney. When asked why he’s going to New Hampshire and not Iowa, Christie took a shot of maple syrup and said, “Maple syrup, yummy!”

Sharon Bialek said presidential candidate Herman Cain needs to tell the truth about what happened the night he made unwanted advances toward her. She added, “You want the job, right?”

Former President Bill Clinton said presidents should be eligible for a 3rd term. When reminded of George W. Bush, Clinton said, “Oh, yeah. Nevermind.”

A spokesman for Herman Cain said allegations of him asking Sharon Bialek if she wanted a job are completely false. The spokesman said Cain is more of a – “Does the carpet match the drapes?” – kind of guy.

Justin Bieber isn’t the first man Mariah Yeater has said is the father of her child. She had previously accused a former boyfriend. But now she says she's pretty sure it's between Bieber and Herman Cain.

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